Lost family

Life is very short and so often we miss out on opportunities. Many of us have come from divorced homes, we saw the good, bad and ugly within our very walls. Some memories want to make us scream and others do a dance in the rain. I will have to say I have in my life remembered the good, bad and ugly of my childhood. I was given the chance though to change my future by moving on from my past and I choose to come to peace with my past and move on. I remember the good times much more than the bad times now. It is not that I have closed them off from my life I know that they lived but now they don't rule me. Not all of us have the courage to do that. We come across people from our past and the longer we are with them the more they make us see parts of ourselves we don't want to deal with. The sad reality about that is as long as you are living in the past it will rule you whether you like it or not. Sorry, I forgive you goes along way. A new page to write a new beginning. There is no good standing at a grave side wishing you had, now let's be honest we often do but if you have the opportunity to make memories that make the past not so bad then go for it. Fear only can hurt you as long as you allow it. There is hope when you face your past and move on. You become free no more chains from days that that just pulled you down. Sadly to say the Lost Family of what could have been a new beginning, often never gets to reconnect and live. It is the lost family found at a grave side. Family members reconnected by a moment but not willing to let go. What could have happened if only they had done so.... The choice is up to all of us... Make families count and let go and move on .... the page is waiting for a new story...lets write a good one.

Freshmen class of 2019

Life slips through our hands oh so fast you hold this small fragile little person in your arms thinking life will stand still and that some how you are different than the rest. Then life happens and you stand in a hall seeing your child graduate next you hear those words College and your heart sinks and is over joyed at the same time. What to do with all these emotions that come. You have this emotional feelings going on that make you want to scream and you have this reality that you have to let go. These young people are feeling perhaps a similar thing life has happened and they have to face the world one class at a time. Some moving away from home others not. It is the circle of life they say. But as each parent cries a tear and each child braves the new adventure I say dream big class of 2019 go to do amazing things, change this world, make a difference do not stand in your fear but stand knowing that God has you in His hands and can do amazing things. It is in that knowledge

that we can hold onto even when life changes and tears roll down our eyes and we can say I know that My God is for me. You class of 2019 can and will change our future and so go make us proud and be the change that God has ordained you to be. Go strong Class of 2019

Life in a moment.

Life is just a fragment of time, everyone knows that but no one grasps that until you realize that you could have been killed or someone died suddenly. This passed weekend I was on my way to help a friend another single mom, I was to clean her house as she moved to another and get a little extra money for doing it. I loaded my girls and I into our mini van leaving a few minutes early in the hope of getting home a little earlier. I was only five minutes from my home and as I turned a corner a flat bed truck that was carrying large truck tires including their rims was speeding up to catch the light in the other lane and one of his tires started to fly through the air. My mind was "Dear God" I had the split second decision go into a ditch or swerve and get hit. So swerve I did, no one stopped no one came to see if we were alright, but as we looked for his tire we realized the unkindness of man that he had come back for his tire, but left us with a smashed bumper and light and feeling unnerved. The horrible reality that no one cared or had compassion to stop to see if three women were alright and as the heat was rising passed the 90's my heart is so disturbed by the lack of compassion. A friend told me that if the tire had bounced more it would have gone through the front window killing me and one of my daughters. I recall an incident in NC this passed winter of a man who had stopped to help someone and then a few miles down the road a person literally had hit his car or him and left him dead. They did catch that person. But life is but a fleeting moment a second can change life forever. A friends daughter died last year in an accident where she was texting she was moments from her home. It is times like this you understand how fragile life is and how as Christians we are suppose to and I say suppose to shine our light. Not all do this but I say sternly we are the light in this dark world and we should show compassion and care for others. If we don't then who will? I will never forget the empty feeling I felt when my brother died nearly five years ago and how a person one week after he died asked me if I had got over his death. Compassion is a life lesson, an ability to shine your light even to people we do not know. So what lessons to learn from a flying tire. Never take life for granted, say you love someone, forgive more and show your light and love for Jesus to as many as you can.

God's Plan

I was fortunate enough this past week to go by a stables near where I live. As my daughter and I approached the stables there was a sign on the entrance "God's Way" as clear as day. I was surprised and my heart rejoiced that someone would be so bold enough to put this on their property. I had the wonderful chance to be interviewed by the woman who owns this stables. "Whispering Hope Stables" in Raleigh is a wonderful place. It is one where you feel the peace and presence of God as soon as you drive up to it. This wonderful property is not just a business but gives back to the community, growing food to feed the homeless. This woman Amy Peters who owns the stables, truly has embraced what God's plan is by allowing God to be present in her work and giving back to others. It is not in thinking of just ourselves but allowing God to use our businesses our talents in our lives to glorify Christ in everything we do. Many times in life we wonder what is God's plan I know I do. As a single mum I am constantly wondering what should I do next God? How will I make it through this year, will I get to go Home to England ever again and the list goes on and on. But God always provides always sees my Big heart and has never let me down. Even in my brother's death, God was gracious enough to bring amazing miracles through it. My daughter Katie each year collects money and food for "Garner Area Ministries" and each year my family collects warm clothes for "The Salvation Army." It is in these acts of thinking of others rather than ourselves that we see God's true plan. I am just a cashier in a grocery store and yet I have prayed for people, held their hands when they have cried and seen God move in so many peoples' lives. God's plan may be very different than our own plan but it is in Trusting in Him and knowing He has the best for us. I know it is hard truly I have sat crying my eyes out and yet there is this peace that if we take steps of faith that God will do great things. So look beyond what we so often see in the mirror and see that God has great plans for you. I truly believe that. The best is yet to come.

Happy Fathers Day.

Throughout the years of my life I have pondered what Dad really means at times I would be reminded of my own dad and how I remembered him as a child. He never had much time for us always busy, always working I am sure at times he must have been quite lonely. As an adult I would look back remembering the good times, walks in woods every New Years Day I so hear his voice as we would walk through the snow "God has wiped and made the world clean" or sure something similar to that.It appeared in our walking and running through woods there indeed was an escape from reality. He and my brother would play badminton every summer, it was just like Wimbledon but better as we watched them diligently playing.I remember as a child standing on his feet dancing and singing songs with him happy memories that feel my heart with a smile. As an adult I would long for a person to feel the emptiness inside of not having a Dad around. I was reminded by someone recently what a dad really is he is the man that opens up car doors for you a true gentlemen, that wants to hold your hand on walks that walks on the outside to protect you, who listens and cares, who when tears fall down your eyes hugs you and cares. The one that remembers nick names of the past and loves you just the way you are.Integrity, loyalty and love go hand in hand. Wisdom abounds and the love to want to learn more and be a part of your life.It is in that person knowing the true value of life and family and seeing in your eyes the child you once were and loving the person you are now. It is in a true Dad's heart that you always know you are loved, cared for and always have a friend to listen and a home to go home too. I never knew what that truly meant until recently. See without that often we feel empty. Fathers day is a blessing to some it maybe lonely but I say dig deep find the good and in that God can do miracles I truly know. Happy Fathers Day

Perserverance/Integrity

When storms arise it is so easy to collapse and just give up. I guess it is my British heritage that says keep on going. Many times during my divorce and loss of my brother the first thought that came to my mind was get on a plane and go home, however no money to do that and no where to live and no job over there. However I have known people who instantly run from issues and create issues for others creating massive battlefields left for others to find out where the bombs have been buried. These people are generally people with one thing in mind themselves and no one else, it is often disguised with not being honest. But what is integrity without honesty what is saying your something and doing something else? As a Christian woman I have tried my hardest to be answerable and honest to others. If I do not do this then my integrity is nothing and I am nothing but a wolf in sheep's clothing deceiving not just myself but others around me. Life should not be what we can get out of it for ourselves but it should be how can we help and bless others in doing that we show the world that we are different we choose to be genuine, open to our mistakes. Perseverance is when you want to run you stand when the storms of life are hitting you and you want to give up but you keep on going. Integrity is knowing when you stand before God you have done your very best, no lies, no deceit just an open heart to say you are not perfect but that you have run the race well and with faith and trust that God has been by your side all of the way. Life is not running from the flames and storms it is facing them and making it through that allows us to stand stronger and knowing that God is more than able, more than capable and that we are not alone. What person are you going to be? a person who runs or a person who stands and allows God to do amazing things and you can say I am a person of integrity or will you be a person like many who says one thing yet does another?

At the end of the day God will judge and I certainly want to be one that God says to me you indeed had integrity. Because Integrity is worth fighting for.

Estate Angel

Have you ever felt like you were walking where an Angel was? I have a few times in my life. Yesterday I went to an Estate sale near my house. I had read about it through an email and gathered my two girls up. We drove the forty minutes to it. I guess I thought it was going to be like a yard sale. But as we approached the house, this wonderful lady approached us smiling face, showing someone around the house. I realized it was the owner- the woman who had just lost her husband. As she walked past, there was this feeling I wanted to be around her, I wanted to talk to her. There was a wonderful spirit in this woman I had never met in my life. As I walked through and past everyone, I felt the mere presence of peace and God. Each room had a peace and there was a sense of a loving marriage. We went up the stairs and there was oh so many wonderful clothes, coats, gloves and shoes. I imagined her dancing at wonderful balls in the amazing long coats. I imagined her husband caringly buying her them. Each outfit appeared to be loved and cared for. It was as if she had flown through each room praying that each item would find a good home. Her life imparted to a new life. I returned on Sunday with a letter in my hand and there she stood. I awaited to talk to her. The Angel of the house- the woman who had God so in her heart that it shone. I handed her my letter and asked if I could pray. As I left I saw the Angel again- this woman I had never met, I may never know her name. Her smile, her heart shinning out of the love that God had given her. Her eyes may have shown sadness of the loss of her wonderful husband but her heart shone with a love that was from Heaven. I may never meet this Angel again, until I go to Heaven. But one thing I know, she is going to make a difference and she I want to be like- the wonderful woman with a home for all and a heart of gold for God: the woman who sprinkles love even in the darkest days and the woman who is an Angel. Thank you God for allowing me to meet your Angel this weekend. May we shine our light as this Angel does so that even in the darkest days others can see Heaven.